The Grizzly Day of Fear

I heard the familiar harsh tones of the Emergency Broadcast System. Only this time, This wasn't a test. This was NOT a test. If it had been a test, we would have been notified that it was just a test of the Emergency Broadcast System. A deep-seeded inner fear swept over me like last-minute election junk mail. It has been 30 years since my parents first warned me of the impending danger surrounding this TV interruption that spells some catastrophe. Next to "losing the house" the greatest fear they instilled in me, was a non-test announcement from the Emergency Broadcast System. Was this a tornado? A comet? Communist invasion? Hardly.

Our TV blasted the tone and then the screen went to wavy snow. Betsy Tyler, Peachtree City information director came on live and reported: "There is a bear loose in Peachtree City." A bear? You mean, I have waited all my life, anxiously expecting the doom surrounding this broadcast and my first time I get "a bear." I thought, "this is what everybody is making such a big deal about?" What a let down. I guess I will have to grin and bear it.

News reports indicated that this was a Black Bear weighing in at around 300 pounds, most likely a young male. Ursus Americanus, or sometimes known as the American bear, this guy had been moving northwest for a few days. In the news report I read, the Department of Natural Resources failed to mention that June and July is the mating season for bears. During this time, young males are known to wander, trying to find that special someone. Considering how off track this Black Bear was, I wonder if this poor fellow wasn't driven to this place by some older bear taking the animal equivalent of Viagra.

Either way, experts from the Department of Natural Resources did say this Black Bear was probably just trying to find a new place to live. Immediately, nine Peachtree City real estate agents arrived on the scene. I do hope the bear got to experience our golf cart paths. And I don't think it was a coincidence that his first sighting was on the Braelinn golf course.

After his first sighting, reports said he was seen headed for K-Mart. This struck me as odd. Did they mean he was going shopping or was this just a landmark for which we could gauge his direction? Of course he might have been heading there, like the rest of us, to pick up some bare necessities. Maybe up to tbuggs to buy a teddy for that furry female friend? On to Kroger for a Bear Claw? To Blockbuster to rent Titanic? (Even bears like Leonardo Di Caprio, but sorry you will have to wait for it to come out on video like everyone else).

So, we had our thrill this week in Peachtree City and it didn't even involve a golf cart or a credit card. Thankfully this situation didn't become a dangerous one. Now we can all just sit and wait for that typical "letter to the editor" from some resident complaining how their serene, idyllic life was so upset by this latest event. Uncivilized bear, how rude.

Billy Murphy -- 7/17/98